Too Much To Say

Well, hello there. It's been a minute since I've updated. I found myself with too much to say and not enough to say all at once, so I decided on nothing at all.

What did I have to say?

I had my final surgery!!

And in the process of preparing for my surgeries, my scans confirmed that all is well in my body!

You're probably thinking, Angie, that's huge, how is it that you didn't have anything to say about that?

When I was a little girl, my mama always said, If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

As I've grown up, I have learned that the reasoning behind that is because our words are powerful - they give life to the feelings behind them, like fertilizing a flower or watering a weed patch. Whatever feelings you  give voice to will invite their friends to settle alongside them in your heart, and raise you up or bring you further down. Your voiced feelings will affect those around you, too.

A lot of the words swimming around in my head and fighting their way out were not, as Mom would say, something nice. And so I didn't say them.

But, as time has passed, I'm in a better space, emotionally, so I think that all the things I have to say can find their way out of my head and into the world, and I can share with you in a way that will feed the flowers and not the weeds.

And, I want to be real with you. So many people I talk to think that I have maintained this happy, cheerful, rosy attitude all through my battle, and that's just not the case. I am real, and I have some real harsh, bitter, angry feelings. But, if you water the weeds, they'll take over the flowers, so I try my very hardest to recognize those feelings, feel them, and then shut them down and move forward.

So, stick around, and I'll update you on what I've been doing, and what I've been feeling.